Shoplyfter Lana Smalls – The Birthday Thief.
„Do we have to do this whole thing?”
Yes, Lana Smalls, yes we do.
Especially when you’re caught with a backpack full of stolen shit from Officer Billy Boston’s store.
That means you get hauled into his office.
It means you’re going to get searched.
It means you’re going to get strip searched.
And just for fun, it means you’re going to get a cavity search.
You offer up the excuse that you were just going to your car to retrieve a birthday gift card to use for the stolen items.
Thing is…you should have just left the backpack with the cashier and THEN get the gift card.
Officer Boston is not buying your lame excuse and is going to call the cops.
You’ll spend the night in jail. Awesome birthday.
However, due to Officer Boston’s demanding schedule, he has no time to pursue the normal social activities we all take for granted.
Things such as picking up hot babes and fucking them.
Lana Smalls, your stupidity has led him to offer you a way to avoid jail time.
You listen intently and agree to his solution as anything would beat being deloused in county lock up.
His solution for birthday freedom consists of: blowjob, standing doggy style, standing missionary, cowgirl, and reverse cowgirl sex.
You give him a handjob to completion which culminates in you getting a facial and it’s off to
celebrate your birthday in freedom!
Most likely you’ll just go home and sit in the bathtub drinking white wine and crying. I know I do when it’s my birthday.
You say it’s your birthday. It’s my birthday too, yeah. Happy Birthday Lana Smalls!!